diary of a happy {pregnant} white woman: chapter one

positive!
i am in awe.
i dont know why but i keep thinking someone is going to come along and take it away from me - like its not real.
i told stephen i wasnt planning on taking a test until i was around 5 weeks or so, just because i couldnt stand the thought of having a negative result and not knowing for sure if it was because a)im not pregnant or b)i took the test too early.
buuuuuttttt i took a test anyway.
positive!
unlike last time, i didnt scream crazy screams, cry, and flail around my bedroom like a crazy beached fish.
i basically just looked at myself in the mirror, laughed, and with a permanent smile called my husband who was backing down the driveway to go to work.
bennett was still asleep.
i ran outside in my jammies shaking uncontrollably, not from the cold but from my excitement.
i told stephen he forgot something when i called him, and i couldnt come up with any trick or clever reveal so i all but threw the test at him. we both laughed and, in shock, hugged each other.
we were both just so happy.
and then stephen went off to work to "support a family of four" and i went inside to eat my cheerios and lucky charms {combined of course - best of both worlds}
bennett slept in until 8:30
after talking several times we decided we didnt know if we believed {fully} the 50cent generic test, but then the $10 digital one confirmed our hopes.
i have seen both my inlaws, my sister rachel, and talked to my mom and erin.
and i HAVE to tell them ALL
stephen said we have to wait.
im thinking maybe we only need to wait a couple days :)

doctors appointment is feb 25th.
a WHOLE MONTH AWAY
THIS is why i have to tell at least SOME people NOW.
or i might go crazy with "secret" excitement :)

yay little tiny baby - grow, grow away and i promise to make every effort i humanly can to make sure you have everything you need to healthfully do so. and as for the rest, i give you to Him, who through ALL things are made possible
what a miracle!
i already love you more than you know.

and now the tears find me
next: crazy beached fish flailing :)