the sun will come out tomorrow

and it DID!

flowers from bennett: "here are some flowers i picked for you mommy! but they are actually weeds"

thanks for your feedback and shared laughs and advice after my last post.  nothing gives me more joy than being a mommy, and being a mommy to these two precious babes.  but sometimes mommies crack, and sometimes mommies with blogs write about it, and its put out there for all to see - whether she regrets it later or not :)  seriously though it was a rough weekend to say the least.  my calm, predictable child has become everything but recently.  the sweet bennett i know and love peeks through at times, but there have been much more tantrums and fits and uncharacteristic behavior and less independence {i.e. more "mommy! mommy1 mommy! mommy! mommy! mommy..."} - all completely expected and explainable after a little sibling is introduced.  he was angelic the first couple weeks, but it was just this past week he became what one would call a "handful." 

and then just like that, after a rainy weekend, the sun came out on monday.

noone said motherhood would be easy, because its not, but for every rainy day theres always a sunny one that follows.  if you havent gathered, i am a person who likes to do a lot of things at one time, plate full, always running around with several projects "in the works."  its hard for me to slow down.  now that being said i will never turn down a day of doing "nothing" - watching tv and taking naps and never getting out of my pjs.  but when i am randomly and infrequently afforded such a day, i can only do that for a day.  and then im back up and running at twice the speed as before trying to make up for my day of lazy.

needless to say its quite the revelation to realize you cannot do everything, all the time, like you once could, and that is perfectly ok.  im not losing sleep over the laundry to be folded and the emails to be answered and the dishes in the sink {and thankfully my husband doesnt seem to be, either}.  and im also not feeling guilty that sometimes i choose to blog instead of doing said things :)  like a dear friend told me, even if its just 3 minutes in your bedroom or bathroom by yourself with the door closed once daddy gets home from work, you have to take it.  you have to rest, you have to breathe, you have to find something each day that helps you clear your head and re-gather yourself, and sometimes...sometimes you have to blog    

thanks for listening to me on my rainy days