the state vs. bennett m roe

submitted into evidence:

exhibit A:


exhibit B:


exhibit C:


exhibit D:



defendant unable to attend court due to the fact that it was "his bath time."

therefore, we the jury find the defendant, Bennett M Roe:

GUILTY of first degree refrigerator-door-hot-sauce-theft,

and his mama, Natalie Roe

GUILTY of second degree negligence {apparently averted eyes while packing cooler for weekend}, and second degree aiding and abetting {left said refrigerator door open for far too long whereby providing undue temptation for two year old son}

sentencing:
Bennett sentenced to time out for a total of two minutes, no chance of parole
Natalie, his mother, sentenced to another smelly stain to add to the list on sofa shown in Exhibit C

defendants family praying they do not have a repeat-offender on their hands
{all signs point to THEY DO}